When My World Was Shattered and Time Stood Still

Christmas Eve Morn, normal day

I go to work, overall it goes well.

Come Two O’Clock, an early release to enjoy the impending holiday, it’s time to go.

At home awaits parents, half the siblings and sweet grandmother. Can’t wait!

There she sits, glowing in her red/black dress and red blazer. A vision, so stunning.

I greet her, “Bendicion!” and kiss her cheek. She smiles, so happy to see me.

Christmas Eve Night, normal night

I, with half the siblings go to a Candlelight Service, it goes well.

Come Six O’Clock, it’s time to go.

At home awaits parents and sweet grandmother. Can’t wait!

Upon arrival a game of Dominoes commences, deal me in.

Silly comments made, “No se hace trampa” –“No cheating”.

Jokes, fun and laughter.

Dinner is served, everyone eats together, it’s a good time.

After the meal is finished, the Christmas Story is read from Luke. In Spanish.

A Second Christmas Eve Service, beautiful.

It’s getting late, time for bed.

Christmas Morn, Special Day

Breakfast is made, all eat together. All goes well.

Pending Skype date with the other half of the siblings. Can’t wait!

Gifts are opened, gratitude is shared.

Blessings are requested from the grandmother via Skype and love shared.

She’s tired, perhaps a nap is needed.

Tummy ache?

Lunch time, can’t wait!

She’s not hungry though.

Late afternoon, 911 is called. I see her color and life fading before my eyes.

I call to her, touch her, hold her. She does not respond.

She’s gone I fear.

At the hospital. Waiting, waiting and more waiting…

God what is happening?

My fear confirmed as the doctor comes in to give the news.

No. No, we don’t want to hear but it’s said anyway, almost on deaf ears.

She’s gone. Forever.

The moments shared together with her, fresh in my mind. On replay. Clear as day.

So vivid.

I will never forget.

My world just about ended. The Pillar of Prayer. The Warrior. The sweet, cherished, beloved woman.

She was gone.

I’m angry with God, how could He take her and on Christmas Day no less?

How could He take her? Knowing I wanted her to bear witness to “monumental” moments.

Yet, how I could be so selfish. She is complete, full, with no pain. She’s with Him in eternity.

One day, I will see her again.

One day I will hug her again.

One day.

Until then, my world will never be the same. It’ll remain shattered, broken.

I will still miss her; I may still cry for her.

But there is peace knowing she’s in His hands and went to be with Him on the best day.

To celebrate Christmas in Heaven.